This weekend has been busy. My Mother has been in and out of the hospital twice this week (it's really not a big deal she does this a lot for attention). Usualy when she is in the hospital I stay away as she has a habit of going mental (she has issues) but when she calls screaming and crying that people are trying to lock her up I feel the need to be there for her so off I go.

Darian (13) had an Orthopedist appointment Thursday. The Doctor feels he may have a ligament tear due to the car hitting him weeks ago.

Yesterday I took Darian to a MRI appointment so I should be hearing what is going on with him soon.

Cullen (9) has been very fresh latley which I assume comes from his Father not calling. It will just take some time for him to feel the feelings then come to the realization that his Father wants nothing to do with him. Not an easy task for anyone let alone a 9 year old.

Isaiah (4), Geneva (11 1/2 months) and I went to the family swim at the Y this morning which was very relaxing. Neva fell asleep on my shoulder in the pool. I did not even realize it until a family was laughing and then I took one look at Neva... she was out for the count.

Neva has been my light in this madness with all the new things she has been doing. Once she started taking those first steps the indpendence must have got into her blood stream. She waves hi and says hi, wave bye, pretends to talk on the phone saying hi, walks all around, feeding herself with her hands. Gosh all kinds of things everyday she is adding something else to her acomplishments.

 

Geneva (11 1/2 months) and I were invited to a Mother's Day brunch today in Dorchester. The organization that held the brunch is called 'A Woman's Concern'.

I was fortunate to become involved with their group as I came to them while pregnant with Geneva because I was thinking about an abortion.

They were not what I expected a pro-life group to be about. The counselor there did not tell me what to do or what was wrong she did just what her title suggests. She counseled me on the pros and cons of both decisions.

One of the most powerful statements the counselor made was that I should not base a decision to have an abortion on what was going on in my life right now as things can change. She offered stories of other women who had made the decision to abort their babies because of that reason then a year from then their life was so much different. They were then left with that guilt.

She was right as one of the reasons I was thinking about abortion was my job at the time and the stress I was going through. Look at me now I am no longer with that job. In my heart I know I would have felt guilt and regret. If that decision was made I would have never known what it was like to have a daughter... to know my little angel Geneva.

It was on that day when I first met this group that I laid eyes on my baby girl for the first time. Their organization offers free ultra sounds to women who are thinking about abortion. When I saw her little heart beat my feelings began to change.

The counselor called me once a month through my pregnancy and once every couple of months now. There were times when no one was standing beside me with the choice of life but her. Her support was worth a million dollars to me.

Today was so wonderful to see Moms with babies that were helped just like me. Babies that may have not been there today if they had not walked into the doors of A Women's Concern.

I smiled through the brunch looking around the room at all these babies who know life because a stranger reached out to offer support to their Moms.

This is my song for the Saturday Blog Crawl. This song is dedicated to all my single mom's raising their kids without their Daddy's and all the single men raising their kids alone (shout out to Figment). Listen to the song it is EXACTLY what we're going through ladies.

Please remember that we can not change the past. We hold a lot of guilt for the fathers being absent. We should wash that guilt away as we are the ones standing at the front line molding our children into the strong... loving adults of the next generation.

I know I have a few of you on here that can understand this. Love you all have a great weekend.

[Verse One]
Tell me why when you put a camera on a thug
The first thing out of his mouth
Is I wanna thank my mama
And some say that causes drama
But its subliminal
Theres no efforts needed
Its like pouring water on the ground that already seeded
And you know it happens all the time
So Ineed to ask this question

[Chorus]
Why oh why is it hard for dudes to always be around
Tell me how can a boy be a man
Only getting fed from a woman's hands
Tell me what do you think will happen
When you don't come around
Its gonna be hard for a boy to be a man
Only getting fed from a woman's hand

[Verse Two]
Now tell me what turns a boy into a thug
Just as soon as he leave the house
See he don't have a man to give him little rules
So he don't running in and out
But it's okay 'cause mamas there
And mamas doing the best that she could ever do
But the funny thing is when it's all said and done
She probably did it better than you can ever do

[Verse Three]
Tell me how will a boy learn to stand on his own
How can he make it all alone
How can he be responsible
If he dont have his daddy to show him how to be there
Not to minimize what his mama does for him
I'm just saying he gone need ya'll both
Can you tell me why why why
Does it gotta be so hard to do a daddy job
It's gonna be hard for a boy to be man

[Chorus]


When you missin' his first game
Don't even know the boy nickname
Thats a gotdamn shame
You supposed to the daddy father
The boys role model
Thats supposed to be you